Anger Management:
A Guide for Teens
Do you know that keeping your anger in check is good for your health? People who manage their anger get sick less often, and feel better emotionally-for real! Anger is a natural emotion but sometimes anger can lead to behavior that is out of control. It may even feel like the anger is controlling you. Have you ever had this happen to you? If so, you're not alone. Many teens have trouble managing their anger. This guide was created to help you understand your anger, and offer you ways to help you control it.
Why do I have trouble controlling my anger?
There are many reasons why you may have trouble managing your anger. The reasons are different for everybody and may be a combination of different things. Perhaps you have witnessed violence at home, in your neighborhood or at school, which can make it even harder to know when your anger is out of control. It may be hard for you to control your anger because you haven't yet learned how to deal with the emotions you feel inside. Whatever the reason, the next step is moving forward to work on ways to understand what triggers your anger and how to stay in control.
Why should I control my anger?
Even at a young age, having difficulty controlling your anger makes your body more likely to have physical problems that can occur now or later. This happens because your mind and your body are connected! These feelings can actually put stress on your body which can lead to medical problems such as:
Having problems with managing your anger can also increase your risk for developing mental health concerns such as:
Teenagers who have trouble managing their anger often have fewer friends, behave in more negative ways, and receive lower grades in school. Haven't had any of these issues yet? You are lucky. Don't wait! The time is right for you to learn how to control your anger and prevent problems in the future.
How can I tell if I'm getting too angry?
Your body has a few ways of letting you know when you are getting too angry. Some common feelings may include:
Are there some situations that make you feel particularly angry?
Think about the last few times you became really angry. You may realize there's a pattern. By becoming more aware of what upsets you, and how you feel when you are angry, you can take control of it before it takes control of you!
Keep in mind that your thoughts, feelings and behaviors are all connected. Your thoughts affect your feelings, which then affect your behaviors. Your behavior can also affect your thoughts, which can affect how you feel.
Since they are all related, making one change—to thoughts, feeling or behaviors—will make a big difference!
What are some ways I can learn to control my temper?
The best way to control your temper depends on you! There is no quick fix. Every person needs to take time to think about what works for him or her. Here are some helpful ideas:
You may feel anxious when you first try to take control of your temper. This is normal! Take time beforehand to plan ways to handle these feelings. The earlier you notice yourself becoming angry the more chance you have to stop your anger from getting out of control.
Is there anything I can do to relax when I'm feeling so angry?
Yes! Every one of us can find effective ways to calm down. Relaxation techniques work by helping calm us. When we are calm, our bodies relax, and physical problems brought on by anger such as a headache, usually disappear. Try the following techniques to help you relax, and check out our How to Lower Stress Guide for more suggestions.
What if my anger feels out of control?
Take quick action! If your angry feelings begin to take control over you it is important to do something to keep yourself and others around you safe. Here are some helpful tips:
What do I do with all the anger inside?
Find a safe way to express it! There are many safe ways to express your anger. Here are a few ideas:
Controlling your temper is hard at first! When you slip up, give yourself a break but take responsibility for how you acted and how it affected other people. A useful way to do this is to apologize. "I'm sorry" is a powerful phrase that can help do damage control!
Resources
(1997) Winning! How Teens (And Other Humans) Can Beat Anger and Depression: A Handbook for Teens, Teachers, Parents, Therapists and Counselors. Vantage Press.
(2002) 60 Second Anger Management: Quick Tips to Handle Explosive Feelings. New Horizon Press.
(2003) Cool It! Teen Tips to Keep Hot Tempers from Boiling Over. New Horizon Press.
(1998) How to Control Your Anger (Before it Controls You: A Guide for Teenagers). Johnson Institute.
(2002) Hot Stones and Funny Bones: Teens Helping Teens Cope with Stress and Anger. HCI Teens.
(1997) Hot stuff to help kids chill out: The anger management book. LGR Publishing.
Links
BAM! Guide to Getting Along, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
Anger Management, National Youth Violence Prevention Resource Center
How Can I Deal With My Anger?, Nemours Foundation
Updates: 8/2/2006
Related Information:
|
Looking for other health info? Check our A-to-Z Index. ©1998-2009 Center for Young Women's Health, Children's Hospital Boston. All rights reserved.
About Us Health Guides By Topic
|
Printer Friendly
Guys' Version